The Manicure, Pedicure, And…Emotional Torture

We recently went on vacation to the beautiful island of Cozumel, Mexico.  Let  me tell you folks- It… Was… Awesome…

Now, when I say “we”, I mean me and Wranglers.  No kids. Just us.

Please, don’t judge me.  I struggled with tons of guilt for not taking the kids.

I mean REALLY struggled.  For about….uh….well…..five minutes.

As most of you know, we live in the middle of nowhere.  So, getting to an airport is even a major deal.
For this trip, we chose the closest airport, which is three hours away.

Our flight to Cozumel left at 5:00 a.m., so of course, we made the drive to our departure city the day before.

Hey, we wanted to “milk this trip for all we could.”

Besides, I was in desperate need of some attention to my fingernails, and toenails.  I don’t take very good care of myself in either department.  Don’t judge me.  Remember, I live in the middle of nowhere.

I made an appointment with this sweet little gal in the nail salon at the mall.  She took one look at me and started talking to her co-workers.  In another language.  I could tell it wasn’t good.  I felt like I was being scolded, however, she kept smiling at me the whole time. 

She started on my feet, more chattering in another language.  Then she said, “you want the sea salt?”

Me: Uh, I don’t know.

Her: You need.  You need. 

More scolding, as she pointed to my heels.

Her:  You need.  You need. Just five dolla more.  You need.  Look here.  You need.

Me:  Okay.  I need.

She brought out all the major tools of her trade, and went to work.
She gave me quite a “work over”.   She scrubbed and scrubbed with that dang sea salt till I thought for sure she had scrubbed down to the bone.
I noticed her looking at my face several times.  Finally, she said, “you want wax eyebrows?  You need.  You need.”
She was right.  I need. 
Lord help me.  I know I am a wreck.  In the nail department.  The hair removal department.  All departments.  I am not even gonna talk about the massage chair.  When she turned it on, I thought I was in heaven.  Until….all the jiggling started.  There was no way I could relax while trying to suck in and stop all that jiggling.  I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.  So glad Wranglers didn’t pop in at that time-I know what he would have done.
So, after having my skin rubbed off, my facial hair ripped off, and my jiggles exposed, I vowed to take better care of myself. 
When she was all finished with me, she said “There!  Now you ready for bacation.”  She was right.
Bacation Vacation, here I come!
Next post will be pictures from Cozumel.  I promise.


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